I Hate to Break it To You

But, Nobody Wants Your Stuff

Advice for boomers ready to unload family treasures

If you are blessed with parents who are still living, now may be a good time to discuss how you plan to handle their belongings once they pass away. It’s not an easy discussion, but it is an important one. I wish I’d been able to have those talks with my parents, but sadly, they both died rather suddenly from a rapidly growing, insidious cancer, within six months of one another. They lived just down the street from me and I became their caregiver. Caring for their basic needs became a full-time job and it never really occurred to me to discuss this while all of our energy was focused on helping them to just make it through another day.

Photo credit: Ryan Robinson, www.ryrob.com

They had “everything” written in their Trust, which was a huge leather-bound binder, and they really believed that’s all I would need in order to handle their estate upon their passing. According to them, their affairs were in order.

Having a Trust is absolutely essential and I recommend all Boomers have one and that you be sure to discuss it with your loved ones. The Trust documents certainly relieved a great deal of pressure for me as we went through the process of settling their estate. But it is literally the tip of the ice burg when you find yourself in this position. It’s difficult to describe it because you’re in mourning. It’s one of the worst times in your life to have to make important decisions.

Once the “big” stuff is handled, the house, cars, etc., you are left with a lifetime of “STUFF” which needs to be dealt with. And guess what? NOBODY wants the prized possessions of your parents, not even you or your children.

Many boomers are charged with having to dispose of your parents belongings. Once you’ve been through this process, you realize how important it is to get your stuff in order. Don’t repeat this process with your children or family members. Start now. Go through one drawer, cupboard, closet at a time. If something is valuable to you, ask your family members if they would like to have it and make a note of it in your Trust binder. Here are a few simple ways to begin the process.

Steps to Begin Decluttering Your Home

Dedicate some time to focus on decluttering

Organizing and straightening up your space takes time. If you’re ready to make some real progress on decluttering your home, schedule a block of time to get started. Make it a priority and stick to it.

Keep only what you’ve used in the last year

Do yourself a favor right now and let go of the mindset “maybe I could use this item in the future.” That kind of thinking isn’t going to work if you want to make your home clutter-free. If you haven’t used an item in the last year, it needs to go to a local donation center or to the curbside in your big trash can.

The timeframe of a year works well because it gives you opportunities to make decisions about seasonal decorations and other rarely used items. Over the course of a year, you will have the opportunity to use every item in your home. If you don’t use something during this time, it’s time to simplify.

One is good, so more is better? No, get rid of duplicate items

If you have multiples of an item (unless we’re talking practical storage items like batteries or lightbulbs) then it needs to go. Sometimes we forget we have something, so we buy it again. I will have my son, Ryan Robinson, address his particular topic in a guest post one day. He has first-hand experience with this issue from having to settle his father’s affairs.

Sometimes we upgrade, but still hold onto a less-useful, lower-quality item.

Why do we do that? It makes no sense to keep the inferior item if we replaced it intentionally. This is especially true when it comes to decluttering and organizing your closets and drawers. Trust me, you do not need ten grey sweatshirts. Sort through your multiples—pants, tops, shoes, and other items. Decide what fits well and which items are in good shape. Keep the best of and donate or trash the rest.

Create a designated spot for items you keep

Everything needs a home. EVERYTHING. Even if it’s going in a drawer. Use containers for drawer organization to help you maximize your storage space. Create ways to house and hold all the stuff you want to keep. And remember, if you don’t use it, toss it. If it’s a product which has expired, toss it.

Cut back on paper clutter by digitalizing your photos

We all have hundreds, if not thousands of photos. Here’s the good news. We live in a day and age where we can store all of them on our computers and in cloud storage. It may be a bit frightening to discard those treasured items, especially if you’re new to digital storage, but once you see how much it cuts back on paper clutter, you’ll be convinced.

It is very time consuming in the beginning if you have lots of photos, but I find that I actually look at the photos more often now that they are digitized. I scanned or took a picture of the original photos and stored them in a “family album” on my computer and backed it up to the cloud. This way, all of us may access them anytime we like. The best part is that I no longer have to store bulky photo albums and/or boxloads of old photos.

Decluttering your home is just the first step. Keeping your home organized and decluttered is where the real challenge comes in. With a little self-discipline, you can train yourself to take the extra step to return an item to it’s “home” immediately after you use it.

Shift your mindset to simplicity and incorporate simple living into your daily life. Remember, less is more. More time, more space, more peace. I am doing this because it makes our life better. Everything in our home enriches our life. A side benefit, which is huge, is that our children will be eternally grateful to us for having the foresight to create a simple life so that they won’t have a huge mess on their hands when our time comes. Hopefully this will help you get started and in my next post, I’ll explore this topic in more detail.

Updated: 18 April 2024